My "Season of NO"!!!!

Hearing NO sucks!!! I hated it as a kid and I despise it as an adult. I hate it even more because at one point I had become accustomed to hearing yes. Hearing no makes me want to scream, jump up and down, throw something, and have the biggest temper tantrum. No, just isn't my favorite word. I have to admit it. I like things to be my way or no way. I mean, I compromise sometimes, but for the most part, I love hearing yes, especially when it comes to success, opportunity, breakthrough, and overall positive outcomes. However, let's face it, we're not going to here yes all of the time. There will be some no's. There will probably be many no's. I learned that just as there is a season of yes, there can very well be a season of no. Sadly, I had to learn it the hard way. 

For the better part of my life, I was used to working hard, busting down barriers, and working my tail off to get to the yes. I was used to things working out. I was used to seizing opportunity. I was used to elevation. I was driven by success (my definition of success, but that's for another post).  But anyways, I craved it, slept it, dreamed of it, and wanted it more and more. I had been afforded a taste of it and I wanted more. It wasn't until I got into the season of NO that I realized that it will not always be yes, and things will not always go as planned regardless of how hard you work. 

You see..... the first couple of no's were okay. I didn't like it, but it was okay because I felt that I could change a few things, work a little harder, or try an alternate path and I would accomplish what I needed to accomplish. Hmph........ That did not work. I still continued to get no, no, no, and no. I tried to handle things with grace and optimism, but that quickly wore out. I'm not going to lie, I started to act just like a kid in a toy store who had just been told that they couldn't have anything. I was angry, irritable, confused, and downright disgusted at all of the no's. I felt helpless because it seemed that I couldn't do anything to turn the no's into yes. I tried waiting, but it seemed that it was taking too long. I wanted a quick fix, but it seemed to be no quick fix. I was in the season no, and it seemed that I could do nothing about it. I felt stuck, abandoned, and forgotten. Eventually it took it's toll. I GAVE UP. 

Yes, I gave up. I started expecting no's. I started wallowing in the no's. I started being bitter. Sometimes, I would get my hopes up, but it would only lead to another no. This really defeated me and took its toll. The most devastating part of how I reacted was the fact that I started to ignore my past seasons of yes. I started to think that I hadn't done enough. I started to think that I was behind or getting behind. The season of no really took a toll on my self esteem, my drive, my energy level, and my entire persona. I lost vision and really wasn't sure of what I should be doing. I had zero passion for anything. I couldn't get into anything. I was drained and sick of hearing and seeing no. 

At my own expense, I wallowed in my sadness. I refused to keep trying because I couldn't take hearing no anymore. It's funny because I had heard the statement, "If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans." Well, I had made a habit of doing just that and it felt like he was getting a great big chuckle at my expense. So, for some time I just went through each day doing the bare minimum. The fire that I once felt had long gone out. I no longer went the extra mile. I did just enough to get by. I decided that I would just wait for the season of no to end before I would do anything else. So, I assumed that meant being miserable, bitter, and downright unhappy until then. 

After some time in my pity party, my negative state of mind and emotions got old. I was tired and exhausted and I had to do something to at least snap out of my feeling of emptiness. I decided that I would fight to get my drive and passion back. I had a purpose in life and the season of no did not mean that I had to give up, feel stuck, or remain in a constant mood of defeat. Maybe, just maybe, I had extended the season of no. Instead of using the time as a time to prepare, level up, and work harder, I felt sorry for myself. I got angry. I did things that didn't make the situation better. It actually made it worse. I made a conscious decision to snap out of it. I stopped and smelled the roses. Life had actually been great and I was blessed tremendously. God had said yes so many other times. He had opened so many doors. He had even placed doors in places that I had no idea a door would be. Now that it was time to do the work and hear no, I decided to throw a tantrum. Ungrateful, right? I was was ungrateful. 

When I realized that the season of no was only temporary and it would only be what I made of it, I decided to move on. I decided to be happy despite the circumstances that I had no control over. I decided to continue to work hard. I decided to find the positive in each day. I decided to be thankful for the no. I decided to practice gratitude. I was blessed and I needed to act and live like it. Most importantly, I had to admit that there was no magic formula or specific time for the season of no to end. I was willing to do the work and wait for my next season of yes. Most importantly, I decided to live life as opposed to allowing life to live for me. 

When I realized that the season of no was only temporary and it would only be what I made of it, I decided to move on. I decided to be happy despite the circumstances that I had no control over. I decided to continue to work hard. I decided to find the positive in each day. I decided to be thankful for the no. I decided to practice gratitude. I was blessed and I needed to act and live like it. Most importantly, I had to admit that there was no magic formula or specific time for the season of no to end. I was willing to do the work and wait for my next season of yes. Most importantly, I decided to live life as opposed to allowing life to live for me. 

So, if you are experiencing a season of no, remember that it is only temporary. Focus on becoming a better you and preparing for the next stage of life.

Take the NO and start being strategic about your goals and plan, plan, plan. Start small, celebrate the small wins, and prepare for your yes.

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